Breaking Free from People-Pleasing: How Numerology and Astrology Transformed My Life

I grew up in a household filled with conflict between my parents. It often felt like a soap opera, with major disputes occurring almost every year. As a child, there was little I could do except retreat to my room and try to ignore the situation. However, there were times when physical altercations took place, leading to police intervention. Despite these issues, my parents never separated—even in instances where my father or mother became physically aggressive toward the other, they continued living together, which I found deeply troubling. Over time, my siblings and I became desensitized to the constant fighting, despite repeatedly expressing that it was unhealthy. My father eventually turned to alcohol and struggled with anger & depression, while my mother developed stress, anxiety that lead to health issues. As a child, I longed to grow up very fast and gain independence so I could leave that environment.

I find myself getting emotional as I write this, feeling deep empathy for my younger self. While I acknowledge that others may have faced even greater hardships, my experiences are still valid. Growing up in that environment shaped me in many ways—it turned me into a "people pleaser" and led me to make poor choices in life. Living in such a turbulent household, combined with the immaturity of my developing mind, meant that I simply didn’t know any better at the time.

A PEOPLE PLEASER:

Conflict avoidant – Someone who prioritizes keeping the peace over their own needs.

Codependent – Often used in psychology to describe someone whose self-worth is tied to pleasing others, especially in relationships.

Over-accommodating – A person who excessively prioritizes others’ needs.

Self-sacrificing – Someone who puts others first to their own detriment.

Approval-seeker – Someone who craves validation and fears disapproval.

As a people pleaser, I often found myself attracting narcissistic individuals in my relationships. At the time, I didn’t even know what the term 'narcissist' truly meant. It wasn’t until later in life—after my separation from the father of my children in 2019—that I began to understand the dynamics I had been dealing with. This realization came as I delved into Vedic astrology and started studying birth charts , which provided me with deeper insights into personality traits and relationship patterns. Looking back, I can now see how my need to please others made me vulnerable to those who thrived on control and emotional manipulation.

I needed to remove myself from that environment and isolate to learn thyself & heal.

UNDERSTANDING MY PARENT'S THRU NUMEROLOGY & ASTROLOGY

Each planet is associated with a number in numerology, which helped me understand why there was constant conflict in my home. Both of my parents had birth numbers ruled by the Moon—my mother was born on the 20th, and my father on the 29th (2+9 = 11, which further reduces to 1+1 = 2). The number 2 is governed by the Moon, which is associated with emotional sensitivity and moodiness. As a result, my parents were often emotionally triggered, acting impulsively based on their feelings in the moment, only to regret their actions later. This dynamic caused significant emotional distress in our household.

Let me also add, that a part of my father's name has the word " Chandra "which comes from the Vedas, Chandra (चन्द्र) is the Moon God, also known as Soma. He is a significant deity in Hindu mythology and Vedic astrology, symbolizing the mind, emotions, intuition, and the cycles of time. And my mother would be called " Sarah " by her close friends, since the mother is represented by the moon in astrology, my janma (moon) Nakshatra is Saraswati.

In astrology, the Moon is deeply connected to our emotions, inner world, and subconscious mind. This is why it's often associated with moodiness, particularly due to its waxing and waning cycles. The Moon takes about 28 days to orbit the Earth, and during this time, it moves through different phases—from the New Moon (dark) to the Full Moon (bright) and back again.

These phases represent changes in energy, much like how our moods can fluctuate. When the Moon is waxing (growing from New to Full), there's an increasing build-up of energy, which can heighten emotions, leading to a more energized or excitable state. On the other hand, when the Moon is waning (shrinking from Full to New), energy decreases, which might cause feelings of withdrawal, tiredness, or emotional release.

The cyclical nature of the Moon mirrors our emotional ups and downs, making people particularly sensitive to its phases. Additionally, the Moon governs the water element, and since the human body is composed largely of water, it’s believed that the Moon’s influence can affect us on a physical and emotional level, contributing to mood swings and fluctuations in temperament.

This waxing and waning process embodies the natural rhythm of emotions—sometimes rising and expanding, other times contracting and retreating, which is why it’s linked to moodiness

As a soul urge number 2, I was destined to experience conflict in my early years in order to become a mediator, counselor, and astrologer, guiding others through their challenges

My Soul Urge Number is 2, it indicates that my soul’s deepest desire is for peace, harmony, and cooperation. Natural inclination towards helping others, seeking balance in relationships, and working well in partnerships.

The Soul Urge Number (also known as the Heart's Desire Number) in numerology represents the innermost desires, motivations, and the true essence of a person’s soul. It's derived from the vowels in your full birth name, as vowels are believed to carry the deeper essence of your being.

People with Soul Urge Number 2 are often sensitive, diplomatic, and nurturing. They tend to seek emotional connection, strive to bring people together, and value empathy and kindness. Motivated by the desire to create harmony and are often drawn to roles that involve mediation, healing, and supporting others. They find fulfillment in creating peace and maintaining loving relationships.

I am grateful for studying subjects such as Vedic astrology, numerology, and the occult, as they have given me a deeper understanding of human nature and, most importantly, myself. Through this knowledge and wisdom, I have naturally taken on the role of a mediator. It has allowed me to make peace with my parents, forgive my father, and reconcile with the father of my children so that we can co-parent in harmony. I have learned that when you choose forgiveness and inner peace, you open the door to new possibilities and personal growth.

Even though I went thru many ups and down in my life, never have I regretted anything that have happened in my life. I love my family and grateful to the father of my kids for our good co-parenting skills. I thank God every day !